Sunday, February 23, 2003
If carrots got you drunk, then rabbits would be fucked up--Mitch Hedberg
I learned a few things this weekend. The more drunk you get, the less alcohol tastes like hairspray. Also, coconut rum, while not as strong as just rum, will fuck you up, mostly the day after. I think I might stick to vodka, which seems to be a more clean-burning fuel and less likely to leave nastiness in its wake. I heart mixing metaphors. So there's my night of drunken debauchery. Now I can say that yes, I did party in college, in case it ever comes up.
I learned a few things this weekend. The more drunk you get, the less alcohol tastes like hairspray. Also, coconut rum, while not as strong as just rum, will fuck you up, mostly the day after. I think I might stick to vodka, which seems to be a more clean-burning fuel and less likely to leave nastiness in its wake. I heart mixing metaphors. So there's my night of drunken debauchery. Now I can say that yes, I did party in college, in case it ever comes up.
Sunday, February 16, 2003
Hey, where'd my comments go?
It is snowing like a mother-effer out there, and I am so tired I could go sleep in a snowbank. Last night while trying to get to sleep I recited epic poetry in my head to distract my ears from the various tv noises coming at me through my pillow. Apparently the wall channels the sounds into my bed and through the light foam of my pillow. And Kirsten, I'm becoming more and more convinced that it's not your tv at all, but various other stinky people who are obviously hard of hearing and like really loud noises after midnight. Okay, maybe not epic poetry, but there were some song lyrics and various reiterations of plotlines for stories that I have to write down.
It is snowing like a mother-effer out there, and I am so tired I could go sleep in a snowbank. Last night while trying to get to sleep I recited epic poetry in my head to distract my ears from the various tv noises coming at me through my pillow. Apparently the wall channels the sounds into my bed and through the light foam of my pillow. And Kirsten, I'm becoming more and more convinced that it's not your tv at all, but various other stinky people who are obviously hard of hearing and like really loud noises after midnight. Okay, maybe not epic poetry, but there were some song lyrics and various reiterations of plotlines for stories that I have to write down.
Tuesday, February 11, 2003
Damn you grammar! Damn you syntax! Damn the lot of you with your declensions and indirect objects and genetive bullshit!
Do you think a heartfelt and tear-stained response paper will convince Dr. Foys that I'm not stupid, just uneducated? I really don't want to disappoint this man, especially considering that I must ask him if I can take the mid-term earlier than everyone else because I bought tickets to an Ani concert before I knew my spring schedule.
Do you think a heartfelt and tear-stained response paper will convince Dr. Foys that I'm not stupid, just uneducated? I really don't want to disappoint this man, especially considering that I must ask him if I can take the mid-term earlier than everyone else because I bought tickets to an Ani concert before I knew my spring schedule.
Sunday, February 09, 2003
Whoooo! and might I add, Hooooo! And yes, I just plagarized that from somewhere. I am so tired. It's that kind of tired that you can feel around your eyes and in your sinuses. Bob keeps calling in to 10-24 let-ins from five minutes ago that I've already forgotten all about. Also, I've been very nice today. Yesterday I felt like such a snotty bitch. Every time someone called me with a question or came into the office I felt the need to apologize after they left. I don't know if I was imagining it, but I think I was being way too condescending considering I work security at a college. Then again, I was also very cold and people kept calling to tell me the same thing over and over again. Yes, I know why there's no heat in Brodbeck. The question is--why don't you? Talk to your colleagues.
Saturday, February 08, 2003
The used gum that was discarded in a wrapper and stuck in my back pocket and forced to live between my ass and the office chair all day has not oozed out or exploded in any way. There is a God.
Guess whose favoritist security guard is coming back for some part time work? Mine. Guess what else? I'm lying about the favoritist part. Looks like I win that bet with Andy. Actually, I didn't really make a bet with Andy, but he was of the opinion that Will wouldn't come back. I begged to differ. Hopefully he'll just be around for parties.
Anywho, today has been quite eventful seeing as the heat went off last night and everyone and their grandmother keeps calling me about it. I got four calls about Brodbeck being colder than a witch's tit and how all the little piano children couldn't be expected to take their lessons in such conditions. There are at least three piano teachers over there--you would think that they'd talk to each other and get filled in about the situation instead of calling me incessantly. Also there was a lady who paid for a weekend pass, or something of that sort, to the pool and she was quite peeved that there are always swim meets on the weekends. I felt like telling her that this isn't a health club, or hell even the Y, and that the school also likes to use the pool at times.
But, the boiler is fired up and heat should soon return to the campus (sigh) I actually enjoyed sleeping a whole night without having to open the window to get some air at 4am.
Anywho, today has been quite eventful seeing as the heat went off last night and everyone and their grandmother keeps calling me about it. I got four calls about Brodbeck being colder than a witch's tit and how all the little piano children couldn't be expected to take their lessons in such conditions. There are at least three piano teachers over there--you would think that they'd talk to each other and get filled in about the situation instead of calling me incessantly. Also there was a lady who paid for a weekend pass, or something of that sort, to the pool and she was quite peeved that there are always swim meets on the weekends. I felt like telling her that this isn't a health club, or hell even the Y, and that the school also likes to use the pool at times.
But, the boiler is fired up and heat should soon return to the campus (sigh) I actually enjoyed sleeping a whole night without having to open the window to get some air at 4am.
Friday, February 07, 2003
I heart being Amy's best friend. I also heart being implicated in things that don't involve me. Tra la la.
I know it's a snow day, but I really feel like it's a snow day, even though I get Fridays off anyway. I feel like I should be doing something. Like working. Oh well, no cure for that.
Also, I must say that Kirsten Wolle is the bestest and I will never forget "Wow, can you believe that James is 30?" I felt like I was on some sitcom. People just don't go ahead and say such things in real life. Except for Kirsten.
I know it's a snow day, but I really feel like it's a snow day, even though I get Fridays off anyway. I feel like I should be doing something. Like working. Oh well, no cure for that.
Also, I must say that Kirsten Wolle is the bestest and I will never forget "Wow, can you believe that James is 30?" I felt like I was on some sitcom. People just don't go ahead and say such things in real life. Except for Kirsten.
